What Up, Jackals? | BRIT SMITH + MISTER TRAMPS | MITCH MEKULSIA | PHILIP PARKER | LEA’H SAMPSON | WEAK ASS AUSTIN COMICS

FEATURING:BRIT SMITH | MISTER TRAMPS SPORTS PUB AND CAFE | MITCH MEKULSIA | TAYLOR DOWDY | PHIL PARKER | LEA’H SAMPSON
She’s so hot! She doesn’t wanna move. Now, the little lion cubs (Hammonds/Pretty Boy/Sampson/Hall)…they start messin’ with Her. Bitin’ Her tail, bitin’ Her ears…she doesn’t do anything. The Lion, He starts messing with Her, coming over making trouble, still…nothing. Now the other animals, they notice this, and they start to move in. The jackals, hyenas, they’re barking at Her, laughing at Her. They nip Her toes and eat the food that’s in Her domain. They do this, and they get closer and closer…and bolder and bolder…till one day – that Lioness gets up and tears the shit outta everybody. Runs like the wind. Eats everything in Her path.
Cause every once in a while, the Lioness has to show the jackals who [the fuck]  She  is.”

NOTE: This legendary clip of Christopher Walken’s “Lion Speech”from 2002’s Sports/Drama/Thriller Poolhall Junkies is merely a metaphor. Also, Christopher Walken, obvs

All right, guys. I tried! I gave everyone a chance, and I gave Mitch like, a billion. 

Stay tuned to AUSTINCOMEDY.ORG today while I fill everyone in on what really happened last night at Mister Tramps, exactly why I let it play out the way it did, the real background of the original bullshit ban, and why it’s fucking shameful how many times all of you (sans Dowling and James Garibay) have stood and watched the harassment I’ve had to put up with at Tramps since the first time I was verbally and physically harassed/assaulted by Lea’h Sampson (and a woman I still don’t have any fucking clue who she is) when I was just sitting, “behaving,” and blending into the background (minus my annoying cackling LOL thing – SORRY) supporting you fuckers. 

Sorry, that’s harsh, I love some of you, even toxic and red flag angry Philip, and it’s because of an enormous amount of patience and annoyingly involuntary empathy tick I can’t shake, but come on, people. As a human being, I just don’t understand how this behavior has been acceptable to any of you – I don’t care who target is or what they’ve “done” to “deserve it.”

Hell, if I saw Brit try and throw out Lea’h, Pouty Dowdy, Angry AF Parker, or evenBig Mitch himself for minding their own business with everyone else on the patio, I wouldn’t hesitate stepping in to confirm the bullshit so I can speak up for them and/or stop the bullshit. No one deserves that, even if they’re hearts are hardened black and they find joy in dehumanizing a fellow comic (who also happens to be the lucky comic who got raped by an Austin Comic who was not only never banned or “blacklisted” from the scene, but ran Kick Butt for another year and a half before he handed it down to Ashley and was regularly booked on “showcases” until he decided he’d rather just stay home and beat me instead 🙂 ) just…cause?

Anyway!

Today should be fun. It’s been an incredibly painful week for me, but I sincerely appreciate this welcome distraction from the almost 24/7 PTSD “episodes” I’ve been suffering from the last several days, as I go almost three weeks without seeing/hearing/holding my babies, because of the abuse and power/control Justin still has as he uses them as pawns in efforts to destroy me and destroy the bond with my children…

So, yeah! Seriously, THANK YOU. I really needed this break from psychological turmoil to blog the shit out of this nonsense, and to call out toxic, sexist, and discriminatory behavior/Comics/Venues in the Austin Comedy Scene…as usual…since obviously no one else is going to fucking do it. 

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